When I first spotted this guy strutting through the Comp room my immediate impression was that this guy must be high up alongside the Government Printer. On asking the senior apprentice Brian Hartshorne I was told that he was the Government Storekeeper in charge of all stores.
Wow, I thought, he must be one of the top men here. What a job – in charge of all government stores. Little did I know that he was just a stores clerk.
Years later, I purchased a block of land at Highbury and thought about placing a printed sign on the block. I needed a sheet of about 4-ply board. So off I go to the store and stupid me approached PS and asked for one sheet. He replied “Sure where’s your ‘chit’?”
Sadly, I did not have a chit and with that he gave me a dressing down and told me to never ever again ask him for anything without a chit.
I left devastated and bewildered and thought what an arsehole that man is. Later that day I sneaked back to the store and took what I required.
Around five years later Fred Hardwicke approached me and asked if I would typeset PS’s daughter’s wedding invitation, it had Nobby’s approval. I replied ‘Where’s his chit, Fred’? I then said to Fred that I wouldn’t set the invitation and told him of my episode with PS regarding one sheet of board.
Fred went red and said ‘I’ve always hated that man. He took off his apron, grabbed the copy and stormed off to shirt front PS.
On his return he was more red faced and said ‘I fixed up that bastard’ and went straight to Nobby and said ‘No one on my staff will set anything for that man’.
Later that day Ray Stagg came up to me and said, ‘Thanks Riley. Now I have to set this up, Thanks Cruel Bastard’!
Caption: The real state of the relationship in the Brown Household
Guests of Honour: Wayne Brown and The Saintly Angela Brown.
Wayne won his OGL Gong for his outstanding contribution to the English Language whilst Angela got a Special Mention for living for 47 years with a man who was Doctor Jekyll at home and a Mister Hyde at Work
Attendees: Alex Riley, Rod Parham, Judy Marks, Ian Russell and wife Yvonne, Dennis Grover, Garth Mugford, Ray Belt, ‘The Powells’ (Rob and Wendy), David and Marilyn Harding, Faye McConnell, Brian Hartshorne, Keith Oxley, John Bryant, David Barber, Mike Carter, Con and Norma Rodgers, Ian and Margaret Pedler, Barry O’Donnell, Ellen Krueger, Eunice Wright, Marianne Hunn, Emma, (Marianne’s friend), Janet McGuiness, Vic Potticary, Geoff Michell, Dennis Duthie and WO Duthie, Peter Meghery.
In Memoriam: Lew Morrison, David Wallis and Ken Crooks.
On the Sick List: Bruce Lockier, Jyll Watson, Charlie Korff, Charmaine Ely.
Highlights of the Day: Barry O’Donnell’s tribute to Lew Morrison. Victorians Dave Barber and Mike Carter were a big hit, although no-one remembered Mike’s name and Ian Pedler stole the show with some stories from the Old Guv Bindery.
It was another outstanding success.
Some years ago The Toff callously inundated the late unsuspecting Bob Miller with a Tsunami of filthy, putrid water by deliberately driving his expensive Jaguar through a large pool of rain water outside the Rex Hotel.
Since then that evil bastard Toff has been looking for another victim.
He settled on Brian “Grubby” Hartshorne, with whom he had a long feud spanning some 50 years.
All over a bunch of bloody leaves, would you believe.
Anyway, we have a mind boggling graphic image from the day of the vicious incident where Riley the Toff finally settled up on his mate Grubby! (see above).
Shocking isn’t it? What a Bastard is the Toff.
Caption: “It’s all True.”- The Toff. With apologies to the late and great Terry Thomas.
At the Old Guv Printing Office there were a lot of dirty tricks played upon honest innocent people by their fellow workmates that delighted those sick bastards.
Take Greg (Sluggo) Novice for instance. At tea break we lined up at the tea urn.
Little did we know that Greg had dropped a cake of Solvol soap into the urn. Needless to say that that dirty trick was not taken too well.
Did Greg stop there? No. Another dirty trick by Greg was to ‘cook’ his saveloys in the urn.
When the tea goers poured out the water from the urn – yep the water was pure red.
Warren (Abo) Pietsch would bring in fresh eggs to sell to a small group of comps.
Imagine the next breakfast as the egg buyers began their breakfast of eggs and bacon. They soon discovered that some, not all, had been hard-boiled.
What a dirty trick.
A smart-arse apprentice Mick Mulcahy prided himself as a morning tea thief.
He would lie in wait as Riley washed his hands for morning tea. On returning to his work frame Riley (The Toff) soon discovered that some of his food was missing. What a dirty trick.
Later that week Riley brought in some cockle cakes for his morning tea. What the dirty little trickster was not aware of was the cakes had been doctored and were mouldy inside.
The dirty little trickster never struck again.
A ridiculous dispute over Alex Riley not sweeping up some flame tree leaves off the pavement outside the Old Government Printing Office in King William Road some 54 years ago has been finally settled.
On the one hand we had a snotty nosed apprentice Alex (the Toff) claiming that Brian (Grubby) Hartshorne (Senior Apprentice) had set him up by scattering flame tree leaves on the pavement after Alex had supposedly cleaned them up.
Alex got into trouble with the Government Printer, Les (The Bull) Hawes who had screamed at Alex and accused him of being an incompetent lazy idiot and what’s more a Liar. All which was true, of course