“My First Day at Work” by Alex R. circa 1950s.

Photo: That’s me on the left waiting outside the Old Government Printing Office with some unknown poor shitboys.
I walked through the Main Front Door and was warmly welcomed by the Senior management gathered in the Foyer.
These lowly lads were let in through the side latrines and there was a terrible rumour that the boys were subjected to evil acts of humiliation by the old English compositors.

Pictured: The Riley Family Coat of Arms (drenched in Blood), bestowed upon the Riley Family by William the Conqueror, a Norman, in recognition of the family’s assistance in the slaughter and subjugation of many poor and defenceless English folk.
By the end of the day I was known as Lord Riley or “The Toff” and I have carried those names with distinction since that day.

As I got older and gathered a lot of lovely boys around me like Colin Haines, Bert Cotton, Brian Stevens and Peter Shepherd we would all go over to the City Baths (right next Door) and have a delicious time cavorting in the water.
There were many happy times in the showers afterwards playing “drop the soap dear”. It was wonderful it was…
It has allowed me to commit many acts of bastardry upon my fellowmen over my exciting and colourful life.
Unfortunately, age is catching up with me and it has meant that I have had to become a “Tightarse” just to survive.
More about that soon…
Alex R.

7 thoughts on ““My First Day at Work” by Alex R. circa 1950s.”

  2. planner9alex

    The taller shit boy in the middle is Grubby Hartshorne. I respected him as he said he was the senior boy. He became so jealous of me as he went home on a push bike whilst I left in a Roller. This lead to the Plane Tree leaf saga. What a bastard he was.
    The Toff

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  4. planner9

    PLEASE NOTE: Mr Rod Parham has not been well for the past four weeks. He has come down with some sort of mystery virus that has affected his way of thinking. Also adding to his problem he is mixing Endone along with Panadol and possibly some out of date BEX tablets/powders. Apparently he is worrying about his forthcoming 70th birthday as he is scared shitless in joining the ranks of the 70’s. Now those who will be joining him on his 70th b/d please note that he will go APE if he is presented with a b/d card with the big 70 inscribed on the front.
    The Toff

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • derwombat

      You got me mate. I am a gibbering idiot at the moment and that 70 thing is jamming my brain.
      I am sorry I punish you so much but you are probably the first genuine bastard I have met.
      Yes, I am terrified of 70 and the card you are right about that and God knows what I will do if its printed in China.
      Apart from all those chemicals you are referring to I am now addicted to Vicks Vapor Rub, black cats (lollies) and Cup of Soups.
      Help me my Toff.
      Rodney
      PS I don’t think I am as popular as I thought I was, Warren was right!

      Like

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